The Doctor's Destiny Read online

  She sat up to kiss him, and he gathered her into his arms.

  ‘The worst of it, for me, is the pain I’m causing you, when all you’ve done is open your loving heart to a boy who needed a friend. And this is how I reward you!’

  Alana tried to speak but couldn’t. Rory’s voice had cracked as he’d spoken—but if she opened her lips it would be a full-blooded wail that would come out, not just a little cracking noise.

  She watched him dress, touched the hand he held out to her in farewell, then, as she heard the front door of her flat close, she turned her face into the pillow and wept.

  They still had one more night.

  That was the first thought that surfaced in Alana’s head the following morning. Then reality crashed through. They’d spent part of one night together and already she ached with missing him. Her fingers clenched against the need to touch him.

  After two nights?

  She’d be a besotted mess and it would be obvious to everyone who came within a mile of her, so she was better off with the one night and getting over it.

  Ha! Big joke, that.

  She climbed out of bed, showered and dressed in comfortable weekend cut-off jeans and T-shirt, then drifted around the empty flat for five minutes before deciding she couldn’t bear the loneliness.

  She was telling the parrot about her problems when the phone rang. Grateful for any interruption—the parrot was the most unsympathetic animal she knew—she answered it, rather than letting the machine censor the call.

  ‘Alex’s working and I’ve come up the road for breakfast. I’ve got the papers and a table. You’ll join me?’

  ‘I’ll be right there—just as soon as I’ve fed Stubby.’

  Of course, as soon as she’d agreed she realised how stupid she’d been. Gabi had extra-sensory perception when it came to relationships. Unless Alana could put on a really good act, she’d guess something had happened. And much as Alana might want to talk it all through with her best friend, she wasn’t ready to share either the joy or the pain just yet.

  But she’d said yes, so she set off.

  Once outside, the brightness of the morning made her wish even more fervently that she’d stayed at home. It was a be-happy day and she didn’t fit in it. She needed an over-cast, drizzling, be-miserable day.

  She decided to ignore it—to pretend the sun wasn’t shining like a light of hope in the cerulean sky. What was cerulean anyway, and why did people talk about sky that way?

  ‘If you keep frowning like that, he’ll think you don’t want to see him.’

  Gabi’s voice startled her, and she looked across the pavement to where her friend sat at a table in the shade of the striped awning.

  With Rory by her side?

  ‘I’m protective colouring. Kirsten’s here, too—she’s ordering. Josh is helping his mother do something revolting to the horses.’

  ‘And Rory just happened along?’ Alana said, telling herself she definitely wasn’t pleased with this development, in spite of the fact that it was so good to see him.

  ‘No, I made him come.’ Gabi sounded inordinately pleased with herself.

  ‘You made him come?’

  ‘Well, I met him at the paper shop and suggested he join us. His house guests are still in bed, and even if they do wake up and come prowling around, they won’t be able to object to him having breakfast with three women. Safety in numbers and all that.’

  She pulled out a chair and indicated to Alana to sit.

  Next to Rory, who waited until she’d subsided into it before touching her lightly on the arm.

  ‘I’ll go if you’re uncomfortable,’ he said quietly.

  She covered his hand with hers.

  ‘I am, but if you go I’ll shoot you,’ she muttered, then circumspectly withdrew her hand but let it drop to rest on his knee beneath the table.

  ‘The thing is,’ Gabi began. ‘Kirsten and I—you know you can’t keep anything from Kirsten, Alana—well, we’ve been talking and it seems that you’re both being far too negative about all this.’

  Alana glanced at Rory, wondering how he was going to take a couple of women interfering in his life.

  ‘Don’t worry, Alana, we’ve already told Rory we’re working on it.’ Kirsten had returned, and she smiled brightly at Alana then answered her unspoken question. ‘He tried to be very stand-offish at first but we’ve broken him down. Once he realised he needed us, what could he do?’

  ‘He needed you?’ Alana said weakly, glancing at Rory and catching a smile that made her pulse race.

  ‘Well, he could hardly have had breakfast with you this morning if we hadn’t been here, now, could he?’ Kirsten demanded.

  Alana shook her head, and Gabi, perhaps realising how lost she was feeling, took pity on her and said, ‘Sit down, Kirsten, and shut up while I explain.’

  Kirsten sat and Gabi turned to Alana.

  ‘We’ve been talking about it and Kirsten’s been talking to Drusilla and Rosemary.’

  ‘Relationship espionage?’ Rory murmured, but Alana was too lost to laugh.

  ‘Both of them say they’re only staying for the custody case. I know Drusilla mentioned renting a flat in Near West, but Madeleine says it won’t be available for ages—’

  ‘Bribery and corruption?’

  Gabi shot Rory a scathing glare and continued her explanation.

  ‘So Drusilla will go back to Sydney, too, and if they don’t make a move once it’s over, then you’ll have to show some spine and kick them out, Rory.’

  ‘I’ll get you to help me,’ he promised gravely, and though a smile flashed across his lips, his eyes remained serious, and Alana knew he was thinking not of the women, who’d been troublesome, but of Jason, who was his prime concern.

  ‘So, you get custody of Jason, the women depart, and with our help—’

  ‘Whoa!’ Rory interrupted Kirsten’s part of the story. ‘I get custody of Jason? Nice as it is of you to award it, it’s up to a judge.’

  Alana heard the tightness in his voice and pressed her fingers deeper into his thigh, hoping to offer comfort and reassurance.

  ‘You will,’ Kirsten told him. ‘That’s what we’ve sorted out. We thought we could all come to court, or as many of us from the flats who are available could come, and explain to the judge that although you might not have a wife right now, you were living in a community of caring people where there would always be someone available to keep an eye on Jason. Gabi’s only working part time, Madeleine or Ingrid are always at home in the penthouse, Daisy’s home during the day, and Alana and I, and the Grahams, and often Josh, are there at night. You programme all our numbers into your phone, with a list for Jason, and in an emergency all he has to do is hit buttons until he gets someone. After all, it was Alex who phoned the fire brigade then found you to let you know what was happening the night he got stuck on the ledge.’

  Rory shook his head, while sudden light dawned in Alana’s head. He’d left the concert a month ago because Jason had been stuck on a ledge!

  ‘You’d all do that for me?’ Rory said, sounding so bemused Alana had to squeeze his leg again.

  Kirsten grinned at him.

  ‘No, but we do like the kid!’ she teased. ‘Anyway, with that fixed up, I really can’t see any reason, if you take it slowly, why you and Alana can’t continue seeing each other.’

  This time she grinned at Gabi. ‘See, I put that very discreetly. I didn’t say “continue your affair”, did I? Gabi says I can’t be discreet,’ she added to Rory, flashing him a luminous smile. ‘And she keeps making doubtful noises when I mention this part of the plan, but I think it would work.’

  She paused, and Alana, knowing Kirsten, wondered what outrageous suggestion was coming.

  ‘We’ll be decoys and Jason-minders and make sure he’s happy doing other things so you two can have time to yourselves, and eventually, once he’s settled down…Well, I thought I’d leave the rest to you.’

  Alana looked at Kirsten. She was o
bviously so pleased with the plan it was hard to throw cold water on it, but in her aching, heavy heart Alana knew it wouldn’t work.

  ‘I’ve never been too sure of what the word meant, but to me it sounds like what they call a clandestine affair,’ she said, then she shook her head. ‘I don’t think so, Kirsten. It’s the clandestine part. I might not know what it means, but it still smacks of sneaky and underhanded, and love isn’t meant to be that way.’

  She looked at Rory, trying to gauge how he might be reacting to this desperate scheming, then realised it didn’t matter how he reacted, it still felt wrong to her.

  ‘I couldn’t do it,’ she said bluntly, ‘because it would spoil something beautiful, and it would also be deceiving Jason when he needs it least.’

  ‘Oh, hell, I hadn’t thought of that!’ Kirsten faltered. ‘The deceiving-Jason part of it. No, you couldn’t do it. I can see that now.’

  She looked at Gabi and sighed.

  ‘Now we’ll have to think of something else!’

  Which was when Rory laughed, and as the rich, deep, melodious sound rolled over her, Alana knew her heart was breaking.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  SOMEHOW Alana sat through breakfast, quietly enjoying just being near Rory, while Kirsten came up with outrageous suggestions, keeping Rory amused with her nonsense, and Gabi smiled but behind the smile was still thinking of possible solutions to the dilemma.

  ‘There isn’t one,’ she murmured to her friend, when Rory, insisting it was his shout, got up to pay the bill, and Kirsten, arguing it was her idea they all eat together, went with him to fight over it.

  ‘There has to be,’ Gabi said, displaying the same dogged determination that had got her onto the helicopter rescue team in spite of a desperate fear of heights and flying. ‘Maybe when Jason’s older…’

  ‘Maybe,’ Alana agreed, but deep inside she knew if they didn’t end things cleanly, frustration would gnaw away at both their feelings and diminish the power of the emotions they’d felt for each other.

  Rory and Kirsten returned, still arguing, and though Rory’s eyes sought and found Alana’s, when they began the walk back to the flats, it was Gabi who walked beside him.

  With tennis practice after school, Jason was late home on Monday, going directly to Rory’s flat for his dinner. Conscious of how much she’d missed him, Alana waited, then, as he walked in, was hard pushed to resist the urge to give him a ‘welcome home’ hug.

  He dropped his bag on the floor in the centre of the living room, then grinned at her.

  ‘Marcus reckons it must be cool to have two homes,’ he said, looking around as if checking she hadn’t changed anything in his absence. ‘And could he have one of the guinea pigs next time Biddy has babies?’

  He chatted on, answering questions about his weekend, telling her technical things she didn’t understand about go-carts, talking and joking, until it became obvious there was something he wasn’t saying.

  ‘What’s up?’ she said quietly, sitting down because she knew she probably wouldn’t like what he had to tell her.

  ‘Rory’s heard from his solicitor. I have to go to court on Wednesday.’

  ‘Are you worried about it?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Did he tell you a number of tenants in the flats are going with you—or sending declarations if we can’t get there—to say we’ll all keep an eye on you if ever Rory’s called out? That’s if you want us to be like extra guardians for you.’

  For a moment she thought she’d said the wrong thing, but when she saw him swallow, and his ears turn pink, she knew it was emotion keeping him silent.

  He bent over and picked up his bag and turned away from her, saying, as he left the room, ‘I’ll put my stuff away. I left the dirty things upstairs. I guess after Wednesday I’ll have to move back up.’

  Stopped and turned.

  ‘But we’ll still be friends, won’t we?’

  She smiled at him, found herself swallowing as well, then managed, ‘Of course we will, you idiot!’

  As he turned away the second time, she saw his shoulders relax, and knew Jason, at least, was OK for the moment.

  Though by Wednesday, everyone was so nervous that tempers were flaring without warning. Kirsten, who’d asked for and been given the day off, rang before seven to remonstrate with Alana that she hadn’t done likewise.

  ‘It’s not too late. Call in sick,’ Kirsten suggested, and Alana snapped.

  ‘It is too late and I really don’t think Rory and Jason want the whole circus troupe of Near West residents in court with them. The solicitor said you might not even get in to say your piece, though the judge will look at depositions. And I’ve done mine.’

  She slammed the phone down then looked up to see a pyjama-clad Jason standing in the doorway.

  ‘Don’t you care what happens to me, then?’ he said, and Alana felt shock rocket through her body.

  ‘Of course I care,’ she told him, then she crossed the room and gave him a hug. ‘More than you will ever know. I want whatever’s best for you, and in my opinion you’re old enough to know that for yourself. If you want to stay with Rory then, as far as I’m concerned, that’s how the judge should decide. I won’t be there, but my promise to always be here for you is on a piece of paper and the judge will read that with all the others. And I’ll be thinking about you all day, and I’m even going to give you my mobile phone so as soon as you come out you can ring me to tell me what happened. Just turn it off while you’re in court.’

  She’d stepped away from him after the hug, but had stayed close, so when she finished her little pep talk she was still within reach of the long, undeveloped arms which reached out to hug her back.

  ‘Thanks!’ he whispered, and bumped his head against hers to ease a little of the emotional tension strung between them.

  ‘I’ll get the phone,’ Alana said, and was heading for her handbag when there was a knock on the door.

  She knew it was Rory before she opened it—not through ESP but from the way he knocked.

  ‘You let him in while I find the phone. It’s far too early to be ready for court, but maybe he wants to take you out to breakfast.’

  She took refuge in her bedroom. Rory at work she could handle. Even Rory seen around the building she could manage. But Rory in her flat when last time he’d been here had been to make love to her?

  No, thanks.

  Not yet.

  Maybe never…

  ‘He wants to see you, and if you’re finished in the bathroom I’m going to have a shower and get dressed then we’re going to breakfast. Cool, huh?’

  Jason imparted this information through the partly open door, and when Alana assured him the bathroom was all his, he disappeared.

  Aware she couldn’t hide from Rory for ever, Alana left her sanctuary, carrying the phone.

  ‘It’s for Jase. So he can ring me.’ The words stumbled from her lips as she busied herself programming in her hospital number, then, unable to resist, she looked up into blue eyes that were studying her intently.

  ‘Good luck today,’ she said quietly.

  ‘Thank you,’ he said, equally grave.

  Then he reached out and took the phone from her, set it on the coffee-table and took both her hands in his.

  ‘For everything, Alana,’ he murmured, breaking her heart into even smaller pieces.

  Determined not to cry, she gritted her teeth, stabbing her tongue into their barrier, concentrating on that rather than the warmth of the fingers holding hers.

  ‘I’ve got to go,’ she managed, when she’d retrieved her hands and her breathing stabilised. ‘Tell Jason the number’s preset on two.’

  She walked back to the bedroom, grabbed her bag, knocked on the bathroom door for a final ‘Good luck’ to Jason, then, avoiding Rory’s eyes this time, she whisked past him and out the door.

  The phone call, when it came, was from Kirsten, not Jason.

  ‘Just be prepared. They’re on their way to see you
. Rory and Jason. Do you look OK? Are there Betadine stains on your uniform? Do you have a clean top in your locker?’

  ‘Kirsten, what are you babbling on about?’ Alana demanded, but there was no stopping Kirsten in full flow. Now she was talking about make-up. Was Alana wearing lipstick? No, maybe not, but check her nose. Shiny noses tended to be offputting. And hair—was it up? Of course it was, she was at work. How about she soften it a bit around her face?

  ‘Kirsten, you’re obviously either inebriated or you’ve flipped,’ Alana said crossly as the gabble of words became more and more confusing. ‘I’m hanging up now.’

  And she did.

  ‘What was that about?’ Will, the only nurse at the nurses’ station at the time, asked.

  ‘I have no idea,’ Alana said, then, hearing footsteps, she looked up to see a beaming Jason heading into the ward, with Rory, looking distinctly uncomfortable, trailing along behind.

  ‘You’re smiling. You’ve won?’ Alana said to Jason, who nodded, then shook his head while his ears turned pink.

  ‘I think we have,’ he said, shifting from foot to foot as if whatever exciting thing had propelled him into the ward had now lost its lustre. ‘It’s kind of up to you. Rory’s cross, but the judge started rabbiting on about him being single and my father’s lawyers made it sound like a crime, and Drusilla and Rosemary were there, just waiting for Rory to say he’d marry one of them, and suddenly I knew the answer.’

  He gave her a big smile that was only partly apprehensive, while the ear colour deepened towards red.

  ‘I told the judge—it’s not like TV courts where the judge sits up high, this was a woman judge and she sat at a table with us. Anyway, I told her Rory was going to get married, and that he hadn’t said anything to anyone because he thought it would be best to get the custody settled first. And the judge asked who he was marrying, and I said you.’

  The final words came out in such a rush that Alana wasn’t sure she’d heard right.

  ‘You said me? You told the judge Rory was going to marry me?’