The Heart Surgeon's Baby Surprise Read online

  further for me to walk through the park then from your

  place to the hospital where my car is than it is to walk

  from here. I’ll see you home.’

  Definitely suspicious but although her lips—he

  really had to stop looking at her lips—opened to protest,

  they closed again, and she didn’t shake off his hand

  when he put it on her elbow to guide her across the road

  and in through the park gates.

  Grace had seen the park in daylight but had not had

  time to explore it, although someone on the team had

  mentioned ponds with ducks and geese, and riding

  trails and dog exercise areas. None of which had much

  relevance for her, so she’d not taken much notice. And

  certainly no one had spoken of the romantic pos-

  sibilities of the area, although as they walked along

  well-lit paths, in and out of patches of shadows cast

  by huge old trees, the park assumed a very romantic

  atmosphere.

  Romantic atmosphere? What was wrong with her?

  MEREDITH WEBBER

  45

  One devastatingly embarrassing meal with a colleague

  and she was thinking romance?

  ‘Peaceful, isn’t it?’Theo remarked, as they wandered

  along the path through a particularly dense bit of

  shadow.

  ‘Yes, very!’ she said quickly. Peaceful was a much

  better description than romantic!

  ‘You’ve settled into your flat?’ her companion asked,

  and once again she was grateful. Perhaps he’d forgot-

  ten her stupidity at dinner.

  ‘Yes, although I need to find a supermarket and do

  some proper shopping, and probably find a means of

  transport to get to and from the shops. I assume there

  are buses.’

  ‘There are buses but I could drive you. You’ll prob-

  ably have a lot of stuff to get and bringing it home in

  the car is easier than carting it home on a bus. After

  work tomorrow? We’d better check with Jean-Luc as

  he’ll probably need to find a supermarket as well.’

  Why was he doing this? Making arrangements that

  meant he would see more of her? Theo puzzled over

  this dilemma as they exited the park, a little part of him

  feeling regret that they’d not taken advantage of the

  night-time romantic ambience.

  He must be crazy, although Jean-Luc would prob-

  ably be with them the following day.

  Jean-Luc? Grace was living in a flat above him.

  Surely he’d have been a better candidate for a sperm

  donation.

  ‘Why not Jean-Luc?’ Theo asked, as they waited for

  traffic to clear before crossing the road to the big old

  house that had been divided into flats and was kept by

  46

  THE HEART SURGEON’S BABY SURPRISE

  the hospital for visiting medical personnel. She turned

  to him, hesitated an instant, then offered him a smile

  that was only marginally better than a grimace. They

  crossed the road before she answered.

  She turned to face him on the footpath outside the

  house. ‘Believe it or not, I did consider it.’ There was

  enough honesty in her voice for him to know it was the

  truth. ‘But how embarrassing for both of us if he felt he

  didn’t want to do it,’ she continued, ‘and probably worse

  if he did agree. No, it had to be someone a little more

  at arm’s length, if you know what I mean. Anyway,

  thanks to your common sense I’ve realised I was being

  unduly optimistic and definitely irrational in thinking

  I could do it my way. I’ll get in touch with an IVF clinic

  here and find out what’s involved in getting on a pro-

  gramme.’

  Clinics, hospitals, how impersonal a way to conceive

  a child. In his mind he pictured this beautiful but basically,

  he suspected, shy woman, sitting in a waiting room with

  other anxious women, talking to the professionals, trying

  to act nonchalant while burning up with embarrassment.

  ‘Look,’ he said, aware he should be running a mile

  yet caught up in her situation against his better judge-

  ment. ‘Don’t do anything just yet. Your father’s

  birthday’s not until the end of the year, you said. There’s

  time. Let me think.’

  She turned towards him, frowning now.

  ‘I don’t want you doing anything for me out of pity,’

  she snapped. ‘I know I’ve made a fool of myself this

  evening but that doesn’t mean I can’t organise my own

  life. And the conception of my own child, should I

  decide to go ahead.’

  MEREDITH WEBBER

  47

  He had to smile and without thinking he reached up

  and brushed the last of the flowers out of her short, fair

  hair.

  ‘I thought that was just what you couldn’t do,’ he

  teased, but so gently he was sure she wouldn’t take

  offence.

  Which she didn’t—just standing there, staring at

  him, the blue eyes brighter than ever.

  With unshed tears?

  He couldn’t tell and he certainly wasn’t going to

  ask.

  But neither did he want her going into her empty flat

  so obviously upset. For some obscure reason this prac-

  tical, efficient, usually composed woman brought out

  all his protective instincts.

  ‘I’ll see you tomorrow. We’ll shop. You organise it

  with Jean-Luc—ask if he wants to join us.’ He hoped

  talking practicalities would help and, indeed, she did

  seem better, for she straightened up and nodded, then

  agreed she’d speak to Jean-Luc.

  As he strode away up the road, Grace leant on the

  rickety wooden gate, watching him go, waiting for the

  stupid tears that had gathered in her eyes to go away

  before she went inside.

  She hadn’t taped him as a kind man, but that’s what

  he’d turned out to be. Unfortunately, kindness was

  something she couldn’t handle very well. She was OK

  when she was being kind. In fact, she liked helping

  people—even people who didn’t realise they needed

  help, her father said—but being on the receiving end,

  that unnerved her, made her suspicious, wondering

  what the person being kind might want of her.

  48

  THE HEART SURGEON’S BABY SURPRISE

  Not that Theo would want anything. From the little

  she knew of him, she sensed he was one of those people

  who were sufficient unto themselves, not needing

  outside entertainment, or company, or even a close com-

  panion.

  She pushed open the gate, aware she was making as-

  sumptions that had absolutely no basis in fact. How

  could she be making such a judgement on a man she

  barely knew?

  But he had been kind…

  CHAPTER THREE

  THEO sat by Scarlett Robinson’s crib, watching her

  chest rise and fall, trying to work out how much of the

  work her lungs were doing and how much the machine.

  She’d seemed stronger earlier today and he’d adjusted

  the flow through the ECMO machine, knowing her
>
  heart and lungs would grow stronger if they had to do

  the work themselves.

  But had he made too big an adjustment?

  Were the drugs she needed already affecting other

  organs?

  Was fluid collecting in her abdomen?

  It didn’t seem so. According to the monitors she was

  doing well, but for how long?

  ‘It always seems terrible to me that we have to wait

  for another child to die so we can save one.’

  He turned, startled by the voice in the night-quiet of

  the PICU, and even more startled by whose voice it was.

  ‘What are you doing here?’ he demanded, as Grace

  pulled a chair close so she, too, could sit and look at

  Scarlett.

  50

  THE HEART SURGEON’S BABY SURPRISE

  ‘Can you ask that question when you told me you

  were coming back up to the hospital to get your car?’

  She didn’t look at him, her gaze focussed on the

  baby, not hungrily but with so much longing Theo had

  to wonder again if she was being totally honest with

  herself, or with him, talking of the baby she wanted as

  a gift for her father.

  He turned so he could see her face and she lifted one

  shoulder in a shrug.

  ‘It’s a habit of mine. Early on, when I first worked

  paeds, my supervisor told me in no uncertain terms

  that to get too attached to the babies and children was

  a sure way to lose focus on the work.’

  She sighed, then continued, ‘And I think he was

  right to a certain extent, but I found I needed to know

  them better—to know them as people rather than bed

  numbers or HLHSs or whatever—so I got into the habit

  of coming in at night to check on them, sometimes sit

  with them for a while.’

  ‘Coming in at night so you didn’t spoil your emo-

  tionally detached image?’ Theo queried, and she

  straightened up and shot him a glacial look.

  ‘I can take an interest without becoming emotion-

  ally attached to a patient. It’s just that someone, seeing

  me here, might think the way you obviously do and I

  don’t want people getting the wrong impression. It’s so

  hard to get into paeds cardiac surgery, especially as a

  woman, that I can’t afford to put a foot wrong.’

  ‘And being an unmarried mother wouldn’t be putting

  a foot wrong?’

  ‘These days?’ she scoffed. ‘I think intelligent people

  have moved beyond such prejudice. But that’s what’s

  MEREDITH WEBBER

  51

  so good about getting pregnant while I’m in Australia.

  Here I’m a stranger so no one knows my personal back-

  ground and even if they do find out about the pregnancy

  they will assume it’s something to do with an ongoing

  relationship back home. And going home pregnant,

  well, that’s the easy part. People will assume I had a

  love affair in Australia and while they may be surprised

  that such a thing happened to a person like me, it will

  be a nine-day wonder then another bit of gossip will

  take its place and life will go on.’

  Theo stared at her.

  ‘Are you really so detached? Do you believe the

  things you say? Believe you won’t be hurt by gossip

  and innuendo?’

  She turned to face him, her defiance easy to read, but

  he suspected that behind it lay pain—pain that she’d

  learned to hide.

  ‘I won’t be hurt,’ came the fierce reply. ‘Neither

  will my child.’

  He believed her about the child—she’d be like a

  lioness in protecting her offspring, but it was almost as

  if she accepted the hurt she might suffer herself.

  Because she’d suffered hurt before?

  That was the likely answer, but would he ever know?

  She was a strange woman.

  ‘She needs a heart soon, doesn’t she?’

  The remark signalled the end of the conversation, but

  although he was willing to admit that this was hardly

  the place to be discussing personal matters, he wasn’t

  finished with this conversation. Sitting with this

  woman, watching her with the very sick child, he could

  almost feel her longing for a child of her own.

  52

  THE HEART SURGEON’S BABY SURPRISE

  ‘It’s not just for your father, this baby, is it?’ he

  asked, and she looked at him again.

  ‘I don’t want to talk about it,’ she said. ‘Don’t you

  realise I feel a hundred kinds of fool already, just asking

  you? If you don’t want to do it, that’s fine, and I hope

  you find it in you to keep it to yourself that I did ask,

  but if you want to spread it around the hospital, well,

  I’ll live with that.’

  She stood up, and began to move away, but he caught

  her hand then dropped it as a nurse came in to do

  Scarlett’s obs.

  He followed Grace out to the lift foyer, standing

  beside her, trying to work out what must have happened

  to this woman to make her so defensive, yet so expec-

  tant of hurt. Except she’d deny that gossip about her

  would hurt—she already had, telling him she could live

  with it.

  Which meant she’d had practice—but why? She was

  beautiful and intelligent—a little abrasive maybe, but

  many doctors and even more specialists had abrasive

  tendencies.

  ‘I haven’t said I won’t do it,’ he told her, as they

  entered a—thankfully empty—lift.

  ‘What do you mean by that?’

  ‘I mean I want to get to know you better. You may

  be thinking of me as an anonymous donor, but I don’t

  want to father a child who might be neglected, or ill

  treated, not that I think you’d do that, but you must

  admit, your reason for wanting a child—as a present for

  your father—is a bit suspect.’

  She stared at him, opened her mouth, no doubt to

  protest, then shut it again and shook her head, frowning

  MEREDITH WEBBER

  53

  so fiercely he wondered if he’d completely squashed the

  idea. But again that valiant side of her he thought he’d

  seen before rallied.

  ‘Of course,’ she said. ‘You’re right. It would be ir-

  responsible of you not to check, although I imagine if

  you donated sperm at a sperm bank you’d only have

  their word that the child would be going to a good

  home.’

  His turn to frown.

  ‘I have no intention of donating sperm to a sperm

  bank,’ he growled, wondering how this woman could

  tie him into knots so easily.

  ‘Of course not,’ she said, exiting the lift on the ground

  floor, ‘but the analogy is there, surely. You’d have to

  trust that the people at the sperm bank would do their

  homework and act responsibly. So what do you want?

  I’ve references with me, both personal and professional,

  and I’ve a plan for child care. Margie, the woman who

  helped my father care for me, still lives in my home and

  although she’s now too old to care for an infa
nt full time,

  she’ll be an ideal granny and she has a niece who trained

  in child care and has nannied all around the world. I

  know she’d like to come home so I thought I’d use her,

  but I want to be a hands-on mother as well, so as far as

  possible I’ll work around the baby and later the child.’

  Grace stopped and looked at Theo, wondering if this

  was what he wanted, feeling acutely uncomfortable—

  well, that was natural considering the conversations

  they kept having—but a little bit hopeful as well.

  ‘Is that the kind of thing you want to know? Or fi-

  nancial things? I could get my bank to contact you. I

  have my own home, no mortgage.’

  54

  THE HEART SURGEON’S BABY SURPRISE

  He made an exasperated noise, grabbed her by the

  elbow and all but dragged her outside, guiding her

  through the car park and finally stopping by a silver

  four-wheel drive.

  ‘No, that’s not the kind of thing I want to know,’ he

  muttered. ‘Didn’t you hear yourself, rattling off the

  perfect upbringing for a child, totally devoid of any

  emotional input at all? That’s what bothers me—the

  idea of a child conceived for the sole purpose of being

  a gift, brought up according to rules and books. Oh, I

  don’t doubt he or she will have a perfect life, but where

  does love come in?’

  ‘Love?’

  The word faltered from her lips, his question so

  bizarre she could only stare at him.

  ‘Have you never felt love? Or if not love, at least

  lust?’ he grumbled. ‘Never felt some kind of emotion?’

  And with that he drew her closer, put his hand to the

  back of her head and bent to kiss her. Or was it a kiss?

  Their lips certainly met, but his were hard and angry,

  hot and demanding, dragging a response from her so

  her mouth opened and his tongue invaded it, as bold as

  a conqueror taking a foreign land.

  Was she really thinking such weird thoughts?

  And why was she responding?

  Because her body wasn’t answering her brain’s

  commands. Her brain was certainly telling her to push

  him away, to move, to run if necessary, but her body

  seemed to be enjoying the assault.

  Eventually it was he who moved, lifting his head and

  breathing deeply, looking up at the night sky, not at her,

  the only sound from him a contemplative ‘Hmm’.

  MEREDITH WEBBER

  55

  After which he unlocked his car, opened the passen-

  ger side door, said, ‘I’ll drive you home,’ and waited for